Thursday, January 12, 2012

Christianity and The Cure for Cross Dressing

I don't remember if I heard this from a college professor or my therapist many years ago, but the question was asked How do you know if you need psychological counseling? The answer is When something is causing you a problem (anxiety, fear, low self-esteem, etc.).

Cross dressing use to be a problem for me. One of the most important arguments (to me, anyway) for why you shouldn't dress as the opposite sex came from the Bible. Deuteronomy 22:5, as it is frequently quoted, seems to say cross dressing is very bad. After reading the entire Bible chapter and talking to some bonafide ministers (men of the cloth, as we use to say), I came to the conclusion that cross dressing is not a sin. One of the earliest entries I wrote on this blog contained this good news.

That led me to realize that cross dressing is not a problem for me, but it continues to be a problem for people around me. I'm not talking about fellow cross dressers. I'm talking about those who insist I am committing a great sin against God when I put on my prettiest dress. I'm talking about men who wouldn't be caught dead with a strand of pink thread in their clothing or women who may wear slacks, but they are in a "feminine cut".

That lead me to the next big revelation in my life -- I have to get all these people into therapy. All these folks have a completely illogical fear and hatred of my pink angora sweater. Those poor, poor folks going through life like this! I say this with all truthful sincerity, I have sympathy on them. Why? Because they are in the wrong, being in the wrong is the same as being in sin, and sin robs us of the joy and peace that Christ wants us to have in life.

Here's an example. Has this ever happened to you. You're watching television with family or friends. Everyone seems to be enjoying the program. Someone blurts out at one point Oh! That's old so and so! Wasn't he gay? What difference does it make to the show this person is on? The actor was not portraying a homosexual. Such a topic didn't even figure into the storyline. What difference does it make if the actor is gay or not. He or she is on the show, earning a paycheck and entertaining the audience. The conversation usually continues with the loudmouth saying something derogatory and claiming to never watch the actor. There's nothing wrong in enjoying a television show, but letting illogical fear and hatred ruin that enjoyment does seem wrong.

It would be impossible to get all these people into a therapist office, and I don't know of many therapists that make house calls. That leaves little ol' me as the one with the greatest chance of having a positive influence on these folks. I do a lot of studying and praying on this matter, and try to always be careful. In all situations I try to be an "upright" person, as the Good Book might say. For those who only know me as a guy, I do my best to not give anyone an excuse to call me a lying scumbag who likes to get drunk and would stab his own mother in the back as quickly as he would stab his worst enemy. For those who know me as Kelli, I hope they have a positive impression about me (not a slut).

While doing my best to be pleasant and good company, it gives me a chance to talk about anything and everything with a Christian perspective. How do I feel about the environment? I think I have a Christian perspective on that. How will the Red Wings do this season? There is a Christian way to respond to that question. Hey, you're a Christian... what do you think about cross dressing? I think I've already said what my answer would be.

A famous minister once commented that many an average Christian, being a good example to others, has led more souls to the Lord than many an average minister in the pulpit. It all starts by changing hearts and minds one person at a time.

Oh... almost forgot. About the title of this post. Christianity in and of itself is not necessarily a cure for cross dressing. Christianity is the cure for sin, a cure we all need.


1 comment:

  1. Hello, as a fellow Christian, I also lament with you about all the fear and hatred Christians have for those who are different. I as a past crossdresser, do in fact believe crossdressing is sinful and wrong. But that is no reason to fear or hate crossdressers, just like most Christians don't fear or hate someone who looks at pornography in their spare time.

    I disagree with you about Deuteronomy 22:5, but your position is very understandable. If you feel like it, you could check out my post about that passage, and we can have a loving talk about it and challenge each other as fellow Christians.

    Last, I tend to agree with your final paragraph. Christianity, or more specifically, a relationship with Jesus is not an insta-cure for crossdressing. Faith in Jesus is a cure for sin, the cure that we all need as you said. But it makes a difference what you mean by cure. Through Jesus I have found freedom from crossdressing. That doesn't mean I have no more temptations to it, but I am free from being controlled by them, and the desires have heavily diminished. We live in tension as we wait for Jesus to return to this earth. We have been cured from our sin past tense. But on the other hand, we wait to be cured when Jesus returns. Faith in Jesus right now does not take away our temptations to any sins in our life. We still are tempted to all kinds of things from crossdressing, to alcohol, to not loving God fully, to not loving other people fully, to pride, to Greed, etc. Often crossdressers think that the only alternatives are having crossdressing desires and giving in to them, or not having the desires and not giving in. But there is a third way, that is God giving you the help you need to overcome the temptations that you still experience.