Let's Do The Time Warp Again!

If there's one thing more futile than being a guy who wished he looked like his idea of the ideal woman, it might be the pursuance of time travel. Theoretically it seems possible, and it has been the basis of quite a few good sci-fi pictures, but apart from top secret hush-hush government labs, time travel will probably remain an unattainable possibility for the general public during my lifetime.

That's a crying shame as I don't consider my choice for a time travel trip to be that difficult. Oh sure, I might be interested in traveling back to ancient Egypt to get Cleopatra's beauty secrets, but my interests lay closer to home. I'd actually like to travel back to the first half of the 20th century right here in the good old U.S. of A. I find the years 1900 to 1960 fascinating -- the people, the lifestyles, the customs of the day, etc. There are many aspects of those years that I miss in this present day and age.

I'm not much of a nightclub kind of gal [stay with me, this is not a change of topic]. It's just not my thing, like the way some folks just don't like broccoli. Over the years, while visiting some major cities, I've gone to drag shows at various venues. Drag is not really my thing either, but I've seen some outstanding female impersonations that blew my mind. The drag queens and female impersonators often dress up like famous female celebrities and lip-synch to pre-recorded music. The dancing and artistry requires true talent. I personally don't find lip-synching to be a bonafide talent, but that's just my humble opinion. Maybe that's why I have been indifferent to such shows.

While surfing the web this afternoon, I came across several videos recorded at Finnochio's nightclub in San Francisco back in 1980. I had heard of Finnochio's and seen still photos of the performers, but had never seen any of them in action. Finnochio's featured a female impersonator revue, and the show really blew my mind. The "gals" looked glamorous, there was an interesting variety of acts, and the whole show was performed live -- the impersonators did their own singing with a live band accompanying them. Now that took a whale of a lot of talent!

Unfortunately, the Finnochio's era was slightly before my time. I believe the place closed in 1993, but I was no where near San Francisco back then, and the only information I had was from a few magazines that the general public didn't read. The internet that we know and love today didn't exist back then.

Go to the YouTube web page and search for "Finnochios". The videos I am referencing are from 1980 and there are 8 or 9 parts, each 10 to 15 minutes in length. I found them very entertaining with a style of glamour that is not available here in 2012. The comments from some of the performers are priceless.

After building that time machine I'll need to buy a fancy dress from Hudson's Department Store, meet my friends for dinner, then pile into my little Nash-Rambler and head for Finnochio's. Sounds like a fun evening.

Kelli

The Same Although Different

In reading the past few entries, I feel I've covered enough ground concerning why I think this blog will be a bit different from most, and why I feel a bit different even within the TG community. I'm sure I'll be writing on this subject again, but I also wanted to say something about how I seem to be the same as most everyone in the TG community.

I noticed that, gender wise, I was not like other children early in my youth. I remember I wanted to play house with the other girls in pre-school. In elementary school I hated sports. I was something of "my own man" throughout public school, just being myself and coping with whatever consequences that brought on. People who didn't like me considered me a loner or the "creepy quiet guy". My friends, the people I hung out with, considered me one of them, and didn't notice anything unusual about me (and thus negating the loner and "creepy quiet guy" labels).

I kept pretty quiet about my feelings. I remember finding quiet time alone with a box of old knitting and fashion magazines. I would stare at the ads for "breast enhancement creams", figure enhancing female undergarments, the latest fashions for spring, and amazing sex secrets to attract any man. I remember noticing my body was changing as I was physically maturing, and I wondered why I couldn't mature into a beautiful young woman. That is what I wanted more than anything else at the time.

When I was about ten years old, I saw a story on the news that shocked me -- a man on the local police force was undergoing a sex change operation and would be returning to work as a woman. I thought to myself "That could be me!"

Like many young TGs, the moment I moved away into a place of my own, I began working on my feminine side. Back in the days before the internet, the most common place to start was the local "adult bookstore" (more appropriately called the "local porn dealer"). I found a few transgender-themed porn magazines I could tolerate (I'm not a big porn fan), but within those magazines I actually found ads for legitimate businesses and organizations that let me know transgenderism was not something to be placed under the classification or "perversion" or "adult porn industry".

I began buying copies of the magazine from I.F.G.E. (I forgot what it was called back then), CrossTalk, and others. Thanks to the contacts section, I was able to find a cross dressing group about 90 miles from where I was living. I carefully contacted them and my progress continued.

There were setbacks along the way. A couple of times when I moved, I completely purged myself of anything Kelli. When I look back at all the clothes, books, and magazines I destroyed, I consider it a great tragedy, especially now that I know how silly it was to purge myself of those things. Transgenderism does not go away simply because you deny it.

The internet has been heaven-sent in my opinion, for people like us. If it had been around back when I was undergoing counseling, I often wonder how much further I could have gone in those sessions (the sessions went very well, I'm glad I went, and I recommend counseling to those who need it).

Long story short, I'm now much happier. There's more peace between my male and female sides, and since I came to the conclusion that neither one of those sides is going away, this is the best possible outcome for all (myself and those around me).

Kelli